Back in January, I made three resolutions for 2011. Usually I am quite open about my goals and intentions and I share them with my friends and family. One morning though, as part of my breakfast routine, I was watching a TED talk by Derek Sivers (it's only 3 minutes long and worth a watch). He explains why our goals should be kept secret based on some very compelling research. Essentially, when you articulate your goals to others, a part of your brain is tricked into thinking that you're closer to achieving that goal, which makes you less likely to take the necessary steps towards making it happen. With this in mind, I have decided to keep my resolutions to myself until they become a reality. But as of tomorrow, I will have begun my 10 day journey towards fulfilling resolution number 1, and thought it was about time I shared it with you all (also, if I don't write something today, I'll miss my June post!).
Resolution Number 1: Attend a Vipassana sitting
For a few years now, I've wanted to attend a Vipassana Noble Silence retreat. For some reason, it has never materialised for me - either due to work commitments or a wedding or some other obstacle. This summer though, it seemed that everything aligned to allow me the time (and courage!) to register for a course. What is Vipassana? It is one of India's most ancient meditation techniques, which was rediscovered by the Buddha over 2500 years ago. The word Vipassana means seeing things as they really are. This is done through a process of self-purification by self-observation. All over the world there are Vipassana centres which offer 10-day silence retreats throughout the year. I'll be attending the centre in Egbert, Ontario from June 22nd until July 3rd.
Some of the few friends and family I have told about my plans were a bit confused as to why a relatively quiet person like myself would need or want to be in noble silence for 10 days. Noble silence is not limited to vocal silence, but silence of the mind and the body. Maybe I'm not a big talker, but I'm almost always engaged in some kind of 'noise' be it watching TV, listening to music, reading a book or writing (case in point). By detaching from all of these distractions, we allow ourselves to experience the universal truths of impermanence, suffering and egolessness. This truth-realisation by direct experience is the process of purification which is meant to occur during the course.
I have never written a single lie or false-truth on this blog, so I won't start now. Of course I feel anxiety about going. Ever since I registered for the course back in February, I've been contemplating whether or not I am ready for such extreme discipline and detachment. It will probably be one of the most challenging experiences of my life. But since Swami's physical passing, His omnipresence is even clearer to me now than it was before, and whatever little doubt or anxiety I may feel bears no comparison to the magnanimous voice within me which is shouting: go! go! go!
While I'm away, I know there will be many special occasions and events I will be missing. Celebrations of new life and birthdays, long-weekend festivities, rehearsals and deadlines - and I apologise in advance for my *physical* absence during this time. You will certainly be in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm sending you all my love and well wishes for the rest of the month! Wish me luck, and I'll definitely post a follow-up when I return in July.
